Sunday, April 21, 2013

My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding: A Gay Couple Marries

I would never say that My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding is a positive thing for American Gypsies. It, along with Gypsy Sisters, paints a pretty nasty picture of fighting, excessive spending and unsuccessful relationships. However, the show tackled an awesome topic today - the marriage of two gay Gypsies. Why is this awesome? It shows us another side of Gypsy culture - maybe not one that the mainstream Gypsies want us to see, but definitely a positive one.

In Huntsville, Alabama, couple Romanichal Tommy and Roma Ivan planned to marry. Their goal was to convince their culture to accept same sex couples.

Unfortunately, both men moved away from their homes and families because they were bullied for being gay. Yet now, they're sharing their stories in order to help others, even if it gets them even more ostracized from their Gypsy communities. (They currently live among non-Gypsies because they weren't accepted by their communities.)

Tommy planned a surprise for his future husband - he called dressmaker Sondra Celli to make suits for the couple to wear to the wedding.

Ivan took a leap and told his brother Benny that he's getting married. His brother knew he was gay but didn't know about the marriage. Unfortunately, Benny couldn't handle the news and told Ivan he couldn't accept the marriage. Next, Ivan talked to his niece Heather. Fortunately, she was supportive and said she'd be attending the wedding. Third, Ivan tried talking to his mom. Unfortunately, she wouldn't show up and sent Ivan's sister in her talk Ivan out of the wedding. She hit some very low blows - she even tried to say Tommy would walk out on him. Sad, very sad.

When Ivan did talk to his mom, it did not go well - she screamed at Ivan about how he shamed her. It was awful. Tommy had a similar fate - he went to see his family and they wouldn't even answer their door for him. His brother did the same thing.

Later, Tommy's mom went against her husband's wishes and reached out to meet her son. Although she didn't approve of her son's union, she said she'd attend his wedding. In other good news, Sondra Celli delivered the pair's outfits herself so she could attend the wedding.

Tommy's bother took the family's car away from the house in order to prevent Tommy's mom from attending the wedding. In response, Tommy picked up his mom in the limo, and he got an amazing surprise when he got to her - three of his sisters, among others, were there to go to the wedding. While in the limo, Tommy 'officially' came out to his family. It was so emotional.

While Ivan's family didn't attend the wedding, Tommy's family treated Ivan as one of their own, and he was very grateful.

At the end, we were told why this couple shared their story: they wanted the other gay Gypsies to know that it's okay to be gay and they shouldn't be ashamed. They should be strong and proud, and they shouldn't have to hide.

We also met Angelina and Chad. When Gypsy Angelina married Gorger Chad, she was outcast from the community. The pair were Christening their daughter, Bella Rose, and trying to reconnect with Angelina's Gypsy family so Bella Rose can have ties to her roots.

Angelina planned a big Christening, complete with Gypsy outfits, to try to find her way back into her community. Unfortunately, things started out badly - Angelina was terribly disappointed by her brother, who refused to come to the Christening and be the Godfather for her daughter. Sadly, only Chad's stepfather and Angelina's dad were in attendance at the church ceremony. And nobody came to the Christening party. It was so, so sad. Because of this, the family decided to move to Florida, where Chad is from - there was no reason to stay in Georgia, which was full of disappointment for the couple.

The other story was Pat Baby and his wife, LuAnn, who had a great relationship until Pat Baby fell into a deep depression and turned to drugs. The pair divorced. LuAnn realized that she needed a job, and because she quit school in sixth grade, she didn't have a lot of skills or ways to make money. Sadly, because of the divorce and the Gypsies' tradition of taking a man's side, LuAnn and daughter Priscilla found themselves being outcasted from the community.

LuAnn, who was staying with her mom, picked up Pat Baby from jail (he was there for drug charges) and give him a place to stay. Pat Baby, in jail, realized the err of his ways and began to improve his life and win his wife back. The problem? LuAnn's mom Karen wouldn't accept Pat Baby, and without her permission, LuAnn wouldn't be able to remarry Pat Baby.  To ask for forgiveness, Pat Baby bought his mother-in-law a blingy ring and got on his knees to apologize. He also proposed again to LuAnn. The pair remarried and were happy to do so.


sfguy4u2 said...

Tommy and Ivan are two men who love each other. They have been bullied by those who were supposed to be the ones to stand by them, no matter what... because that's what families are supposed to do. When flesh and blood turns against you, they're no longer family! Tommy and Ivan have dear friends who stand by them whole heartedly and without judgment. These friends are Tommy and Ivan's REAL family. Kudos to Ivan's niece, Heather, who chooses to remain a part of this wonderful couple's REAL family, and plans to be there for their upcoming nuptials! I don't know these two young men, but if I could be there for their wedding, I would, just to show my full support! I wish you two young men the greatest and happiest future together as a wonderful gay couple!!!

sfguy4u2 said...

After watching the entire episode I am SO happy for Ivan and Tommy that Tommy's mother and sisters decided to come to the wedding! I cried tears of joy for these two young men watching their wedding with all the members of their family with them!

Anonymous said...

I just wanted to thank you for your kind words Ivan is a really good person and a good friend and deserves to be happy.

Anonymous said...

I am also glad that Ivan's Mom decided to go to the wedding. If I had a son who was a homosexual, I would go also even though I do not condone homosexuality. Marriage is meant to be between a man and a woman only. I did not watch the entire show because of this. Please TLC no more.

Anonymous said...

As parents we should love our children unconditionally!!. My daughter is gay,and it doesn't bother me at all!...What matters most is that she is happy,that's the most important to me.Shame on Ivan's mother, and sister!!.He's happy,how horrible of a family to say such unkind words, especially the mother!! I wish these two nothing but the best and it's his family's loss, not Ivan's!!! Amen, the end!...

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anonymous said...

I absolutely do not agree with this episode. marriage is for a man and a woman and in the bible, it clearly states that. I do not support homosexuality nor do I think it's the eyes of God, that is a sin. if you read the word of God, you will understand that this world is filled with impurities and I will never agree with them no matter how a person feels. proverbs 3:5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
Proverbs 3:5 NLT

Unknown said...

Grow up gay has been going on since the beginning of time, if someone is in love except it move on or move over. I'm a mother who may have a gay son and if and when the time comes that he comes out well I'll just love him more. We become parents to love our children for who they are not what the social standing gives us

Margaret Tudor said...

They just showed this episode again today (August 10, 2017). I was so sad when no one came to baby Bella Rose's Baptism Party. That is so cruel and not in the least true Christian behavior. I'm glad that at least the baby's maternal grandfather and step-grandfather showed up to her baptism. Shame on the grandmothers and the rest of the baby's Roma family.

I'm glad that at least some family came to the gay couple's wedding. Sad that one groom's family didn't show at all though.