Extreme Cougar Wives: WTF?!?

TLC aired a special tonight called Extreme Cougar Wives. It's about women that are dating younger men. Not like, five years younger men...like, 30+ years younger men.

We first met Kevin (21) and Jude (in her fifties). The pair had known each other for years...in fact, Kevin had dated Jude's daughter in junior high. Kevin, at age 21, approached Jude about a relationship, and she reluctantly went for it...but it worked.

Hattie, a woman in her seventies, was up next on the show. She likes guys under 30. (We've seen Hattie on TV before, by the way...I believe she was on Strange Sex a while back for being a cougar.) She's very much into sex and bring a 'young soul'.

Stephanie and Octavio were last. Stephanie's husband died while they were having sex, so she turned to younger guys. Octavio, at 13, was seduced by a friend's mother. So, essentially, they're psychological trainwrecks.

(So far, this show hasn't painted a terribly flattering image of cougars and their cubs.)

The show isn't all about the fun of cougar / cub relationships - it's also about reality. Jude and Kevin had to be sneaky about having sex...Kevin lived with his parents! So to circumvent this, Jude had to sneak out of Kevin's bedroom window. Wow. Then Kevin had to tell his family about how he's doing a commitment ceremony with Jude...and they did not approve. (Kevin's brother attended the hand-fasting commitment ceremony and he looked kind of like he would throw up...and I don't blame him, as Kevin addressed the time when Jude was like a mother figure to him.)

Octavio and Stephanie had no picnic either. Stephanie's 65 and Octavio's 28, and while Octavio wanted his friends to accept Stephanie, it was not happening.

Hattie...well, last year she hooked up with an 18 year old. That kid could be Hattie's grandson. It hardly sounds responsible to me.

Don't get me wrong...there's nothing wrong with dating someone older or younger than you. But when your date is 30 years older or younger, you are bordering on creepy territory.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Stephanie talks on Octavio's behalf and says (transcribed from my PVR video): "He always liked older women and when he was, what, 13, he was SEDUCED by one of his friend's mothers."(!!!!)

And she goes on:
"And, that was an affair that he fell in love...(unintelligable)... He fell in love! They had this affair for an entire year. So from his point of view, that's normal. That's what he wants to do." (!!!!)

ARE YOU F'n KIDDING ME????

First of all, it is NOT called "seduction"!!! It is called "grooming" (of a child victim)!!! Second, it is NOT called "love", the correct term is "molestation" and "rape"!!! Third, it is NOT called "an affair", the correct word is actually "ongoing molestation". Basically none of what she was talking about, is called LOVE, the correct terms are FELONY and CRIME!!! The word for this woman is not "girlfriend", but "SEX OFFENDER"!!!

If we had been talking about a 13 year old girl and her friend's father, nobody would be in doubt. They would shout RAPE from the rooftops and the Police would be called in no time.

I find it sad that Octavio seem to think what he has experienced, is "normal" and acceptable. Because it is NOT.

Seeing his background with abuse, I can't help but wonder which impact the abuse has had on his choice of women. If maybe therapy to deal with what he has gone through in the way it should have been dealt with to begin with, might have changed the way he sees women, including women who are more age appropriate for him, especially when it comes to getting a chance to experience having a family. But, of course, I can only wonder, fact is - I do not know and most likely never will. If Stephanie and Octavio truly love eachother, I wish them all the best and hope that the age difference issue won't make life too difficult for them. Because they do not deserve that! Discrimination is not OK!

For the program in general, I must say, there are some characters there! Like one of the other women in this program, can't remember her name, she seems to be a huge attention seeker. Wouldn't surprise me one bit if she chooses young men only because they can handle giving her constant attention and that having a young man is something that in public gives her lots of attention and that is what she wants and craves. I bet that if she comes into a restaurant, she ends out with all eyes on her, young man or not - because she probably is very loud and "flamboyant de luxe", and not always in a good way. Being that way can be very egocentric... Wonder if she pays all that much attention to others around her, unless they give her lots of attention first... Maybe she has been like that all her life but I'm sure it sticks out a lot more now that she is older, as she seems so hyper, half of it could be considered as being "active"... ;) But, I'm sure she has a lot of fun. I only hope everybody else around her does too... :) But, I've got to say, some of what she shared in the program was simply: Too much information! :P

But, if nothing else, watching this show can be somewhat entertaining. Except for the abuse part of this show. That really shocked me and made me mad - molestation of children has a tendency to really provoke us, doesn't it? But it provokes even more when it is talked about in such a casual way, as if it is perfectly OK! YUCK!

I wish somebody could tell Octavio about this, that what he experienced had nothing to do with seduction, that it was serious abuse! Actually, he should go to the Police! Statute of limitations for crime and other useful info (USA) can be found here:
http://apps.rainn.org/policy-crime-definitions/index.cfm?state=New%20York&group=7
I see that in NY, when the victim is a minor, it is 5yrs from the day they become 18yrs of age.

Even if it may be too late for his case, many offenders are serial offenders, and this woman may be too...

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