Tough Love New Orleans: Season Premiere

Tonight, VH1 premiered Tough Love New Orleans, a show that brought us some very relationship challenged women.

First we met Melissa, a 25 year old virgin nicknamed Miss Awkward. She wants to find a guy who will wait for her to be ready, but it hasn't happened yet.

Danielle, 26, is a single mom and hairstylist who dates guys who drag her down. She's nicknamed Miss Low Standards.

Donna, 40, is nicknamed Miss Ticking Clock. She wants kids but her age is a major concern. She stood out right away as someone who's insecure and troubled - she couldn't stop laughing at first and then cried because of how beautiful Stephanie is or something like that.

Stephanie, 27, is nicknamed Miss Husband Hungry. This makeup artist is desperate to find a husband and claims to have to been in love 20 times. She's had Botox, her lips injected and her eyebrows lifted.

After that, we met Tiffany, called Miss Phony. She's in love with herself and calls herself an attention whore.

Elizabeth was next. She's called Miss Gold Digger. She's after a guy with money and a pulse...and that's about it.

Single mom Shalana was called Miss Bitter. She's been hurt multiple times and wants Steve to turn her luck around.

Despina was last. She's Miss Man Eater. She's a man juggler who books her dates back to back, but never dated someone that truly knew her.

The challenges began before the girls even got to boot camp. The girls were recorded in the cab talking to their cab drivers, who were planted by Steve. Unsurprisingly, the girls showed their true colors, and Steve was sure to let them know their flaws.

The guys came into the room with Steve and the woman, and then Steve brought them to another room to talk about the women while they watched on video. John spoke first about his cab ride with Elizabeth. When one of the guys said she'd suck the life out of men, Elizabeth didn't take it well because she's not good at criticism. Next, Melissa was criticized for being awkward. Stephanie was told that she looks like a porn star and would make her dates look bad. Tiffany came off as totally self centered.

Steve visited the girls the next day and told the women that they'd be going to a Riverboat party full of eligible bachelors. They'd each have three sets of beads, one to give to each guy they like. After the party, the guys would reflect on the women that chose them.

Melissa was immediately awkward. She complimented a guy's hair because in her opinion, guys are all afraid of going bald. Elizabeth did well and actually seemed engaged in conversation. Donna introduced herself to everyone as if she was running for a political office. Stephanie chose one guy on a snap judgment (being her type) but opened herself up to a nice guy that wasn't her type, as well. Danielle made it clear that she wouldn't give her beads to anyone. Tiffany drank a lot and overshared about her drinking habits. She also spouted out the fact that Melissa's a virgin, which was completely inappropriate and destroyed any progress Melissa may have had made. Melissa ended up leaving in embarrassment.

The guys went over to the girls' mansion. Melissa did relatively well talking to a guy until she told him their astrological signs aren't compatible. We then flipped to Melissa in the confessional saying that the girls need a 'vagina whisperer'. That was a bit awkward, Melissa!

When Steve brought the girls to the group session, Elizabeth was told that she did the best. One of the guys had great feedback for her, saying that she was genuine and shy. Elizabeth agreed to see this guy again.

Stephanie was discussed next. Steve told her that she didn't make enough of an effort to tone things down. The guys immediately noticed that she's had a lot of surgery. One guy (John) complimented her personality but she needed to tone down her looks.

Melissa was third. Steve showed a clip of Melissa asking a guy if his spiky hair is a defense mechanism. When Steve showed that, Melissa cried. However, when Melissa saw her feedback, one of the guys said she's the whole package and said he'd like to be set up with her.

Steve them told the women that he has a surprise for them this season. He instituted a three strikes rule. If a woman ends up in the hot seat three times, she's out of the house. Unfortunately, Tiffany only had two strikes left after today, because she was the first person to be put in the hot seat.

Steve told Tiffany that she fit right into her phony archetype. He also called her manipulative. Steve called Tiffany out as a liar - she's 31 but told the girls that she's 29. She also failed to mention that she has a 13 year old, a 10 year old and a 15 month old child. It turns out that she didn't even tell Steve about her kids. When Tiffany was forced to tell Steve about her kids, she admitted that her 10 year old and 15 month old have the same father, and he's married. And, his wife was pregnant with his kid at the same time as she was. Tiffany swore that she's not involved with that man anymore, but I'm not sure I completely believe her.

Steve ended the episode by giving each girl a necklace. Their name was on one side and the other side was blank. Steve planned to add something positive to the other side of each necklace, but only when the girl earned it. And with that, the first episode of Tough Love New Orleans ended.

Takeaways:

Melissa may be awkward, but she's fun. I'm a Melissa fan and I hope to see her succeed this season.

Elizabeth made great strides early in the competition...it was great! It's not often that a woman on this show turns around so quickly, and I hope her improvement continues.

I love Steve's new three strikes rule! I think this is a great motivator to get the women to succeed. Women in the past seasons have ended up in the hot seat week after week, and this is a great way to get them to try not to end up there.

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