Thursday, September 8, 2011

WTF Is Courtney Alexis Stodden's Deal, Anyway?

Courtney Stodden, the sixteen-year-old bride (who recently turned seventeen) of Doug Hutchison is all over the internet, and almost none of the press about her is good. So, what is her deal, anyway?

The Confusion and Controversy

Courtney Alexis Stodden made headlines...well, maybe found a small bit of internet fame...when the sixteen year old girl wed fifty one-year old Doug Hutchison of Lost fame. At first, people didn't believe that she was actually sixteen years old. It turns out that she truly was. However, claims that she hasn't had plastic surgery are more debatable. And the claim that she's not a fame whore is even less plausible.

When the announcement of Courtney's marriage came out, so did her attempt at a music career. And her singing is not good. I don't want to pick on this song in particular because of the subject matter (soldiers serving our country), but if you want to hear an awful song, give We Are America a try. It's a hot mess of whining and auto-tune gone bad.

What I really don't understand is what is up with Courtney's mom. At the age of seventeen, Courtney looks about forty, possibly from overuse of makeup and Botox injections. But even beyond allowing her daughter to do whatever she did using artificial additives, Courtney's mom supported - and signed a document allowing - her marriage to a fifty one year old man. She actually suggested the marriage, according to reports. Reports also state that Court and mom are both seeking fame, so I guess that explains the marriage, but it doesn't explain the lack of parental instinct and the "WTF" factor of it all. Even better was that mom claims Courtney is a good Christian girl and was a virgin until marriage. I'm not sure I believe that, although I guess it could be true, since she did get married at sixteen years old.

The Fame Seeking

Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison had been rumored to be shopping for a reality show (hence the reason for the marriage, I'm sure), and it looks like they may have gotten one. Details have not yet been released, but I'm pretty sure the show is going to flop. If Heidi Montag and Jake Pavelka couldn't bring in views for VH1's Famous Food, I doubt two people that no one cares about can carry a multi-season reality show. Update: They've gotten a producer for their reality show.

Also, when offered great publicity via call in interviews for national radio shows, Courtney and Doug required a $3 million dollar payment, even though the publicity would go way further than the cash. I guess they figured they could get even more publicity by making a big deal about money than actually doing the interviews.

The best part of all is Courtney's PSA about bullying. It's all about herself...and how she can turn the negative of bullying into a positive thing. I think she's a bit misguided, and highly recommend that you watch this video. She has a great point - bullying is wrong - but Courtney voluntarily puts herself in the public spotlight, and sometimes negativity comes along with that. (Hint: It's not jealousy, like she claims it is.)


Looking at Courtney Alexis Stodden's Twitter account kind of makes me want to puke. I understand that Twitter is a public forum in which users can post whatever their hearts desire, but aspiring singer Courtney Stodden's Twitter account just about crosses a line. I'll share a few of my reactions to her tweets, then list some so you can share the agony. First, the girl loves alliteration. Every sentence seems to be along the lines of "Sexy sultry star sees some stuff!" only about really inappropriate things. Secondly, she's way too graphic about inappropriate topics. I mean, I understand that she's married and that married couples can be, um, intimate, but that doesn't mean I want to know about it. Want to know what I'm talking about? Below are some of Ms. Stodden's tweets, and be of these things is not like the others.

I am going to get drilled today... & I'll keep my mouth open the entire time. I'll be a good girl... I promise. Mmm... I LOVE the Dentist!

Had a bodily breakfast in bed this morning; It was so tasteful... Just like sweet syrupy pancakes completed with a lush creamy filling. Yum!

Drenched within a very sensuous Sunday morning! God Bless! "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed." Proverbs 16:3

Softly stepping my sexy silhouette out of the showers sensuous morning steam to prepare for a delicate day.

Embracing this heavenly hike that I am on w/my pretty-in-pink pooch Bazaar as I taste the spices of the sun on the tip of my tender tongue.

Has your gag reflex kicked in yet? I'd be surprised if it hasn't. Also, can you tell which tweet is not like the others? How is a girl who is so open (and disturbing) about sex claiming to be religious? I guess I just don't understand.

Courtney "Rilly" Loves Herself

If you don't get the "rilly" reference, that's the way it sounds when Courtney says "really". In any case, the girl is hardly modest. Her YouTube page describes her as "Stunning Beauty; Courtney Stodden is a multi talent. She is an upcoming recording artist that writes her own music, actress, model & dancer". Before she was even remotely famous, she put out an anti-bullying PSA that ended up sounding so self-centered that it was amazing.

Unfortunately, some of Courtney's self promoting comes out in a beyond ridiculous way. On her website,, she encourages people to look for her on Elvis Presley's Top Friends on Myspace.

Parodies and Jokes

Courtney's attempts at fame have gotten her a whole lot of internet parodies, but since she and Doug are seeking fame, I guess all press is good press. created a fake advice column that seems pretty accurate for what Courtney would say. made fun of her tweets. gave us an article called Grammar 101 with Courtney Stodden.


Lina said...

I started following Courtney on Twitter after The Soup read some of her tweets. I could not believe they are real. I don't know what the deal with this girl is. Idk if she is really 16, if this marriage s just a publicity stunt, or what. But I really can't wait for the truth to come out. And is she does get her own reality tv show, I will watch! haha

Anonymous said...

I won't lie...I LOVE my reality tv. I don't know if I could bring myself to watch this...okay, I probably could, but still. ;)

What a freak!