This week on Toddlers & Tiaras, we saw the Universal Royalty Pageant. The competition ranged from babies to twenty-somethings. The winning pageant girl would be handed $10,000 cash, right there on the stage.
First we met Dianely, daughter of Fransoly. I think the daughter's name is pronounced like Dee-anelly. Dianely wanted to do gymnastics, but mom wanted her in pageants, so she made her quit. Mom said Dianely's muscles got too big and she didn't look pretty in a dress. Mom Fransoly was pretty brutal - she told her kid very clearly if she didn't like what she was doing.
Mom Fransoly was kind of awful. When Dianely said she likes all of the colors of the rainbow, her mom said she can't like them because that's ugly. She has to pick one color.
Next was Lola. Lola was coached by her aunt Lee, nicknamed Malee and mom Lynn. Lola is one of three daughters in her family. Her mom's got expensive taste - she likes custom made dresses and would never consider buying one secondhand.
Hailey was third. She was the daughter of mom Joey. I believe that she is one of five siblings. Sister Samantha acts as her pageant coach because she was in pageants when she was younger.
This pageant made history: it was the first one to give away $10,000 to one winner. This pageant was hardcore - if a contestant is late, each judge will take off one point from her score.
Beauty is the most important competition because it gets three sets of scores from the judges, ranging from facial beauty to performance.
Of the featured girls, Lola went first. She underwent a major transformation when she had her makeup on - she looked much more like an adult. She did well but her smile wasn't great.
Hailey went next. She was very polished. Her mom commented that she knows two of the pageant judges, and she thinks their typical choice of winner (a blonde girl) puts Hailey at a disadvantage.
Dianely went third. She did well, although her smile looked a little scary, probably because of her flippers. As part of her bio, mom wrote that Dianely thanks her mom for making her dreams come true by letting her be in the Universal Royalty pageant. Umm...wow. We clearly learned that she'd rather be doing gymnastics than pageants!
Lola cried on stage before her talent because she wanted her aunt Malee, not her mom. As soon as Malee got there, Lola started her routine.
According to sister Samantha, Hailey did her dance perfectly. I don't think she's an extremely talented dancer, though. She was good but not spectacular.
Dianely did great at first, but forgot her moves in the middle of her routine. Instead of comforting her, mom seemed to be less than supportive. Despite her mistakes, Dianely continued on in the pageant.
Fransoly and Samantha thought it was ridiculous that teenagers were competing against kids and babies. Fransoly even said that the older girls should be embarrassed to compete against kids.
All of the kids did well in swimwear, but once again, Dianely's flipper was really distracting.
3 year old division:
First runner up - Gwendolyn
Queen - Lola
6 - 7 year old division:
Third runner up - Madison
Second runner up - Hailey*
First runner up - Dianely
(I couldn't hear the name of the queen)
*At this point, mom Joey said the pageants are fixed because the same types of girls always win.
The $10,000 Grand Supreme cash winner was...
Hannah, a 20 year old contestant.
At this point, the moms got catty, and one said that Hannah should remove her cellulite with her winnings.
It really doesn't seem fair to have babies competing against girls in their twenties. Clearly, the older girls will be more polished. She was also blonde, which kind of fit into Joey's concept that pageants are always looking for a blonde, All-American type of girl.
If you like Toddlers & Tiaras, you'll probably love Dance Moms on Lifetime. I don't know what Lifetime was thinking putting Dance Moms in the same time slot as Toddlers & Tiaras on TLC, but whatever! I'll be DVRing it.
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