Monday, May 9, 2011

Strange Sex: Nat and Abby Are Awesome

On Strange Sex, we saw a female-to-male transgendered person discuss his transition. It was great that he was so open about it. What was even better was watching his girlfriend Abby support him the whole way.

Nat, born Natalie, transitioned from female to male through hormone therapy and gender reassignment surgery. I give Nat so much credit for following his heart and finding himself.

What was truly amazing for me, though, was hearing his girlfriend Abby talk. Abby and Nat began dating when Nat recognized himself as a man, but was physically female. Abby detailed their relationship, stating that she knew she (a straight female) had a connection with Nat, and although it was difficult at times, she stood by Nat in a relationship.

Like other relationships, Nat and Abby's wasn't perfect - they broke up / separated a few times when the relationship became difficult (like during times when Nat's hormones went wild during hormone therapy). But overall, Abby stuck by Nat and even made a comment that it was awesome that she'd get to pick the size of Nat's new penis.

I truly respect Nat for following his dreams and Abby for being so open about how gender, while it matters, isn't a deal breaker in a relationship just because it doesn't fit a typical stereotype of who a person likes. It was great to see Abby be so open about her feelings and relationship with Nat. She isn't hiding from the world and pretending that Nat was born a guy - she loves Nat for who he is inside, and that counts for a lot.

Props to Abby and Nat!

I feel that I should call attention to a few other details of the show, along with talking about how awesome Nat and Abby are.

* Nat's parents are amazing. The fact that hey helped Nat with his transition, and were willing to share their story, is fantastic. I hope they realize their story will help others in similar situations.

* The show had a realistic portrayal of a female to male transition. The show showed the struggles that Nat faced. Strange Sex did not make it seem like switching from a male to female body is easy - it showed the struggles with hormones, cost for surgeries and more.

* I give Nat so much credit for following his heart. He struggled through high school when he couldn't begin his gender reassignment, but overcame that and found his way to happiness. I can't even imagine the pain and stress that goes along with gender reassignment, and Nat seemed to handle it as well as possible.


Bearyhot said...

How can we find Nat's band's name? He has a great voice!

Anonymous said...

Just saw the show. Never mind the fact that he s so incredibly hot but yeah, he has an amazing voice. Great head on his shoulders. We won't know everything he went through and we don't need to. We juts need to understand and accept.

Anonymous said...

What size did they choose?

Anonymous said...

I respectfully disagree with your interpretation of their relationship. I found his comment about beginning the transition "so I can be the man she needs me to be" rather disturbing. I was also upset by her decision to leave after 4 weeks, because "here's my boyfriend, she's 22" was "too difficult". I found that an insult to the trans community.
Now, I'm cisgender (well, more andro, but not dismorphic) but I'm an advocate, supporter, and friend to the trans* community. I'm also in a serious relationship with a man who identifies as trans. I just feel for him, and am glad he (seemingly) has had steady, unwaivering support from his parents.

Anonymous said...

I completely disagree with you as well. I found Abby to be very rude and disrespectful towards Nat. He could find someone who will accept him, and not basically tell him to change his gentials to be with her.. I myself, am a cis gender woman dating a ftm trans man and we watched this together, needless to say, very disturbed. It was offensive to the trans community and us. I have never told my boyfriend that he is "still technically a female" or called him or introduced him as "she". Why would she say "This is my BOYfriend" and then go on to use female pro-nouns? I am very appalled by this episode and especially her attitude. Shame on you for being uneducated and thinking that it was cute. No offense.

Anonymous said...

i agree with the people above. My boyfriend was on testosterone booster before (not for transgender related reasons) but i understand how it made him completely moody and unbearable to live with. Having said that I feel bad that Abby left Nat what? four times. in a way she almost doesn't deserve Nat. When he was in the interview and he started crying when he explained how hard it is for him and people around him don't understand. Obviously he was referring to her and obviously it clearly still bothers him and is an ongoing issue between the two of them. Either stay and support him or don't. what abby did was repeatedly break his heart. I am a nurse and if i heard a patient say "I am getting the surgery for her" i would immediately call the surgeon back to have a consult. This transformation should be for himself not just her.

Anonymous said...

And he's letting her choose the size and whatnot I'm only concerned that he may be putting way too much into her she seems like she may be sweet and genuine and that she truly cares however she might be merely attracted to the excitement of it all because she just keeps leaving when it seems like reality sets in. Also she'll eventually want to have children and that maybe just another excuse for her to leave. Talk to him and his family he does have a really great set of parents that are amazingly supportive. And I hope he finds true love eventually with Abby or not

Anonymous said...

I feel a creepy sense in me when i read things like this, even though I have been through tough emotional feelings for a girl I loved and still love to this day.I told her how I felt, a couple years later after several bad relationships with guys she tells me she had developed feelings for me[but had met a wonderful guy and told her mother about me, that I had feelings for her, also then told me to stay out of her love life].Although I am hurt by what she told me deep down I am so attracted to her that she wouldn't have to aplogise to me I can't hold any ill feelings or anger towards her.
I was married when I told her how I felt so what did I expect.
She's now married to the same guy she spoke to me off, I do still wish that I could be the one she would be with forever but it will never be and I no longer even communicate with her.
I only want for her to be happy always, I don't think that I could have made her happy, not with this body.
Yes, I am a woman, an indian woman as is she.I believe I am straight, she is definately straight as she is really feminine.
All of us should realise that life is'nt just about what we want or feel and that god makes no mistakes.

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